Notes by Menelaus on Helen’s Abduction

Part 1 of The Trojan Chronicles: Menelaus’ perspective on Helen and Paris; part of a series exploring the theme of Troy and the Trojan War


I was in Sainsbury’s,

the one opposite Brent Cross,

a cherished food hall for my Greek neighbours,   

between aisles seven and eight –

Chilled Foods and Newspapers and Magazines

stocking up on feta and tiramisu

for the speed dating party

when you called  – “number unknown

flashed up on my phone – saying you wanted

to hear my voice, was missing me,

though you’d only been gone a week,

but I could hear him behind you,

his hands travelling the slopes

so familiar to mine.

I do not care which god has his back;

does he think he can steal you away,

this bastard birth who should have died,

but now struts a purpled Trojan prince

at the wheel of a pimped BMW?

Pass my words onto him;

I swear I will fuck him up,

him and his in distant Hisarlik,

their bones left bleaching on the beach

for the white crows to divine the paths

the gods have scripted us into already.

Tell him he will not know love for long.


© Bhi 2023
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Interesting to see how it fares on here.

I like the poem, up to your excellent standards as ever, but being ignorant of such Greek things (Nic will kill me) I would not have made the connection without the preface.


I’m with Guaj on this. But I suspect the very reason you’ve given the preface was to allow comprehension from a wider audience. I’m sure you know already what an accomplished piece this is. Well done. (Ahem… I was going to comment on a place that gives cerise globes, but saved it for here.)


Wow! I mean, brave, or what? It did blind side me at first, then I got into it: Menalaus in Sainsbury’s!

a well-written piece about a lover’s wrath

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