first day out with Aoife

first day out with Aoife
two ‘Seaside Special’ day returns
to ‘kiss me kwik’ and candyfloss,
a ‘pirate cruise’ around the bay – 
no extra cost
in the middle of nowhere
a juddering halt –
the guard announced
‘cows on the track’
Aoife looked out the window, 
‘it’s a sign, come on, let’s go!’
we walked an ancient track-way –
a gothickry of gnarly trees
Aoife broke the silence,
‘this reminds me of Sligo’
she plunged through
the soft-jungle hedgerow
chasing bouncing butterflies
embroidering the sky
I chased after her fluting laughter
we climbed through gorse
and bramble thickets
heading towards sunlight
dappling the trees
at cliff-top
Aoife threw wide her arms
spinning in Sufi exultation,
‘this feels just like my first communion’
a pirate ship crossed the bay
a speedboat skimmed the waves
Aoife lilted a Highland lullaby
reminding me of Aberfeldy
where I was dumped for
a better than me
Aoife kissed my cheek
I squeezed her hand
and wiped a tear
‘we’ll come again this summer
and make a pathway leading here.’

© coolhermit 2023
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critique and comments welcome.
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Rick, I love this the first time I read it, and it hasn’t lost a single mote of charm.


CH, good morning,

Like the line with sufi exultation; can picture the whirling dervish that must have been aoife.

But tell me what a first communion feels like – me not having had that experience; are we taking about the sense of wonder and silence in a gothic space? The light headedness of realising you’re close to love and are in love?



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