Is that you Bobby?

This is based on a rather sad encounter I had some years ago.


Is that you Bobby?

She’s losing it.

Distracted? Oh yes.

Her brain’s on another plain. A crazy confusing pain. A runaway train.

Can’t distinguish then and now. Just can’t sort it, don’t know how.

Crashing waves of memory land – and dissipate into sand.

Where am I? Who am I? What am I?

Who wants to know?

Who said that?

Is that you Bobby?

 

© Alanson 2020
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critique and comments welcome.
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Stormwolf

Oh yes, I can surely relate. I really was moved reading this. The way it is presented, the short lines, the questioning all add to the subject matter of the poem. On reading the lines give the impression of disembodied voices.
We also have the visitor’s inner thoughts

‘Her brain’s on another plain. A crazy confusing pain. A runaway train.’
It is a very painful subject.
The last 4 lines are excruciating. Such a feeling of rising panic and striving for comfort and grounding….

Well written and original in its layout.
Alison x

ps plain should be plane 😉

Last edited 20 days ago by stormwolf
Griffonner

Wow! This is very emotive, and accurate (though that isn’t a good enough word – at least not equal to the strength of your piece.)

I have experienced this in real life – though the name was, of course, not the same. But the vibration that you have given to us to read reverberates within all of us who have
‘been there’.

I rate this highly, and marvel at its power in so few words.

Allen

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