Fred’s Lockdown

Here’s another take on the lockdown. Fred is a fictitious character, but then again he could be real ? 🤔


He tried his hand at cooking

created some ” tasty” meals,

but he got food poisoning

from his dodgy jellied eels.

He decided to take up yoga

got still and calm to meditate,

but he ended up on the sofa

drinking lager by the crate.

He bought some boxing gloves

pummelled a huge punch bag,

but he kept on stopping

for yet another crafty fag.

He badly needed a haircut 

as his barnet grew really long ,

but as he hacked at it himself

it now looks a mess and all wrong.

He listened to lots of music

watched boring daytime T. V.

but he got addicted to pizza 

and drinking copious amounts of tea.

He put on lots of weight 

so no longer “athletic” or thin,

but due to lack of sunlight

he’s now ashen with pale skin.

He remained positive though

stayed cheerful and upbeat,

but often forgot 8.pm Thursday nights 

to clap along with others on his street.

He completed the whole lockdown 

and survived eating his awful grub,

but the experience hadn’t changed Fred

as he immediately got drunk in the pub !

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critique and comments welcome.
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Griffonner
2 months ago

Poor old Fred, eh? I hope you don’t mind me saying that I liked the concept of this – but the fact that it was phrased and rhymed like poetry took the shine off it for me: I found myself wanting to make it scan better.

You’ve covered a lot of the things that happen to people in confinement though, so good observational stuff. 🙂

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