reflections on Billy Liar

reflections on Billy Liar
 
why can’t I be happy
like Julie Christie
stepping from that lorry cab
carefree – hair swinging loose
to a background jazzy flute?
 
my lift’s dropped me
in the Midlands,
 
Redditch? Hanley?
Burslem? Longton?
 
I’m knackered,
no grub, no digs,
pubs are shut
no cigarettes
 
I’ve no friend to ring and ask,
‘can you come and pick me up?’
 
I only wanted love,
to live in love,
share it with you,
get a little back
 
knowing you were mine
and I was yours,
would turn my life
from grey to wondrous –
I’d skip broken backstreets
like Julie Christie
that day she changed the world
 
winter nights, warm duvets
a lover’s breath brushing my face
wondering at her night sighs,
mutterings, and giggles
as the picture house inside her head
runs ‘one night only’ movie reels
 
our lives were suffocated
by the pain we inflicted
battling for the ‘upper hand’,
constant fighting quenched the light
of that high and holy land –
the dreamscape we created,
 
you, me, kids, a family
 
how did it come to this?
not even a barbed-wire ‘so long’ kiss
 
she called me bastard,
I called her bitch
 
we should have settled for
easy coming, easy going,
casual indifference –
 
we chose love and tasted bitterness
 
I did not want to hurt her
she did not want to hurt me
not really – it happened anyway
 
God may forgive us for what we committed
to break free of the others’ clutches…
 
but we can never forgive one another.
 

 

 

© coolhermit 2023
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griffonner

Another enthralling tale told in your special way. Nice one Rick.

Bhi

Brought to mind Paul Simon and “Darling Lorriane

What!? you don’t love me anymore?
What!? you’re walking out the door?
What!? you don’t like the way I chew?
Hey, let me tell you
You’re not the woman that I wed

Spent a month once living in the same house and not a word passed between us. Once broken it’s hard to fix. Superglue doesn’t cut it.

Bhi

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