Two poems

Two poems about houses. I wrote the first about an old house and was then challenged to write one about new houses. 

Inevitably 

North wind rapping at my door
Hammering at the shutters
Whirling, whistling through the floor
As the chimney stutters
Blowing from the fiery hearth
Windows at a rattle,
Hearth and home or wind and weather
Which will win this battle?

Battle’s over; house stands firm
But nothing is forever
It relaxes term on term
To the wind and weather
In the end, who’ll win the day?
Enemy implacid.
Mother Nature makes her way,
Mordant. Killing. Acid.

 

ConTemporary

Well-fitted doors, soft-creaking floors
Radiators cracking,
Pitter-pat of window rain
Light as angel’s tapping.

Dry and still the stagnant air,
‘Gladed’ saturation.
Giant screen, the cornered troll,
Illuminates the nation.

Sat outside, the family car
Four by four or normal
On the drive where guests arrive
Never, never formal.

Peace and calm. Tranquillity,
Cosseted salvation.
Only broken by the beat
A thumping adumbration

Shrieking voices, clacking heels
Music – loud, insistent
Penetrating through the walls
Thickness non-existent.

© e-griff 2020
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critique and comments welcome.
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Savvi

Hi griff I really enjoyed the two poems but thought the opening in both were a little weak compared to the final Stanzas so if I could be so bold as to ask you to consider the hybrid below where the house starts young and grows old. Just a thought, your poems work well on their own but I thought it might be fun to try this. Hope you don’t mind. Best Keith Peace and calm. Tranquillity, Cosseted salvation. Only broken by the beat A thumping adumbration Shrieking voices, clacking heels Music – loud, insistent Penetrating through the walls Thickness… Read more »

Sweetwater

Loved the flow and rhythm of both they read very well.
I had sympathies for both houses, but I think the first one pulls me in the most, comfortable, settled and friendly more character.
The second although beautifully modern and comfortable, as with all modern houses it’s soulless, very low in character, and as you cleverly ended with,
paper thin walls. Sue.

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