Twas the Night Before Christmas 2016

Mickey-take of Amazon’s ‘Twas the Night Before Christmas’ re-write competition. Nudged here by Alison Storm. 🙂

Twas the night before Christmas,

The kids were fast asleep,

But down below, Mum and Dad,

Were lying in a heap.

Bottles, cans and Rizlas,

Were scattered on the floors,

The air was thick with ganja,

And deep contented snores.

Outside, the snow fell gently,

Then the pair began to stir,

For they had much better resins,

Than frankincense and myrrh.

They had a toast to Santa,

With a Carlsberg Special Brew,

Followed by an Alco-pop,

And a snort of Superglue.

Then Xmas Eve was Xmas Day,

And the kids flew down the stairs,

Bursting with excitement,

To see wot would be theirs.

Tyson got an ounce of Skunk,

And a magnum of Chianti,

While Chantalle got a stainless bong,

And a bag of Shiva Shanti.

So Christmas Day moved into night,

In a happy disarray,

Then (just like St Stephen),

They got stoned on Boxing Day.