One Stolen Night.

Just one night was all she asked.


Time runs swift about the moon

to carve her scars across the heart:

so come my gallant, wayward bard

come, wrap your dreams in midnight lace. 

For while in dusk the stars to chase 

and shadows now, the day discard 

shall faith and vow this eve depart, 

till dawn recalls you to her tune.

 

© sweetwater 2020
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critique and comments welcome.
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Savvi

Lovely to read out loud sue love rhyming scheme and the way you catch the internal rhymes, gentle as ever. Best Keith

Nemo

I like the romantic feel in this poem. The first four lines run very smoothly but I stumbled over ‘the stars to chase’; and I took the line ‘and shadows now, the day discard ‘ as not needing the comma. but I wondered if there should be one at the end -‘and shadows now the day discard,’ Also, sorry to be a bit dense but I couldn’t understand ‘shall faith and vow this eve depart,’ What is the subject of ‘shall’? I realise the language you are using captures the style of the 19th century Romantic poets, but, grammatically, I… Read more »

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