Why I Live Alone

a final revision


I live alone in a big house

With Erin’s cat, Mr. P.

When she died, two years ago,

He was an ornery fourteen.

I drive out to the cemetery

A few times a month now,

Sit on the ground by Erin’s stone.

I tell Erin I love her.

She knows, but likes hearing

Me say it.  I tell her I love her

Every day, all day long.

She rolls her eyes, is gone.

© slovitt 2021
Views: 3763
critique and comments welcome.
Subscribe
Notify of
15 Comments
Inline Feedbacks
View all comments
Belcanto

This is so moving. A lovely piece. But you’ve changed your ending a lot, haven’t you? The last five lines? I love what you did. It’s like when people share funny/amusing memories about the quirky side of their loved and lost one, as well as expressing the overwhelmingly sad feelings of grief. People will laugh and cry at the same time. This is what you’ve accomplished here with those last lines. We can all picture a young woman rolling her eyes at her dad’s’ excessive’ declarations of love and taking off, probably embarrassed. In case her contemporaries are within earshot!… Read more »

Stormwolf

Hi Swep,
I remember this too. I cannot envision the pain and sadness to lose a child.
I think the last line can be read different ways but the ‘is gone’ is painful to read in its finality. The simplicity of the lines adds much as it suggests deep pain and sometimes pain is so deep it cannot be verbalised.
It also fits with the fact you are speaking of a child. Brought tears to my eyes.
Alison x

Stormwolf

I understand. Not the grief, as nobody who has not experienced it can truly imagine, no matter how they may want to empathise, that is so personal to you but the tears that come as you enter that dimension. I often cry too, as I write a sad poem or read a sad one, that brings me back to that level of feeling. At the last UKA meeting I attended down in London, I almost lost it reciting one because at once I was reliving the feelings. It became a bit surreal for me. I have tried to share some… Read more »

Valdohren

Very poignant. Grief and love, the two go hand-in-hand.
Val x

Mitch

Very moving, Swep – and a worthy homage to Erin. I am reposting a poem/song in a similar vein today Best wishes. Mitch

Leila

Swep,this is simply beautiful, exact, precious, ever loving, the ending perfectly captured and crystal clear…Leila

Flag Content