Bad Little Boy Named Percy!

A Dr Seuss inspired children’s verse about a bad little boy.

“So, my little Kookaburra what kind of bedtime story would you like tonight? A singing kangaroo? The magical shampoo? Or old Scooby-Doo?”

“None of that rot will do. I wanna hear the story of the bad little boy named Percy LeGrue!” the tucked-in little girl exclaimed out loud.

“Cousin Percy again?”

“Yes!” she almost shouted.

“Well, okay, once upon a time there was a bad little boy named Percy. He stomped down the halls; he wrote on the walls; he broke all the laws; and he spat in the vase.

He had tussled blond hair; big blue eyes that stared like he just doesn’t care. He even ran up and down the stairs!

“One day he did a deed that everyone agreed was too mean to be believed! He sneaked upstairs to Grandpa’s private commode with a jar of Vaseline. Later when Grandpa went to sit on the loo, slid right off and yelled ‘WOO WOO WOO!’

“’If you cut that boy’s hair you’ll find horns!’ Grandpa declared as he rubbed his derriere. Grandma just stood, her eyes open wide. ‘I’m gonna get a hickory switch and tan his hide!’

“Percy overheard that last and was quite aghast. He wiped off his smirk and went down to lurk for the very best place to hide in the scary dark basement. They searched high and low. Where did that brat go? Couldn’t find him all that afternoon. Finally brought in Lexy the dog who sniffed and sniffed until his nose took him down to the old furnace room. 

“There was Percy curled up fast asleep, inside the furnace about to kick on! They barely got him out as the flames lashed about and poor Percy was burned on the bum!

“Treated like a king for surviving everything, despite not being able to sit down, he went right back to slamming all the doors, tracking mud on the floors, getting lost in a crowd, and talking too loud. Percy remained a bad little boy.”

© ChairmanWow 2021
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critique and comments welcome.
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Bhi

CW, I am going to read this to my youngest and see what critique is forthcoming. I enjoyed this roustabout and definitely up there with the madcap Seuss.

On the editing front, i would check the speech quotes in the last part where the dad is relating the story.

Last edited 1 month ago by Bhi
Stormwolf

This is what my much loved departed fellow poet Bozzz would call ‘Prosetry’
Not really one or the other but exquisitely done.

I can see this as a children’s book with lovely illustrations. I know it would sell.
Maybe give it some thought? Kids love that sort of naughtiness, they just do!

Alison x

Last edited 1 month ago by stormwolf
Supratik

It’s so sad to know that Bozzz is no more. He was my first friend I made here. I have often wondered where he might be. This news makes me sad. Will miss him. May his soul rest in peace.

Last edited 1 month ago by supratik
Stormwolf

I know. He often teased me about my beliefs in the after-life because I am a confirmed believer and he was a confirmed atheist.
I sometimes fondly think of him and smile because by now, one of us is right! lol
We were a good example about how two people holding totally opposing views could love and respect one another.
Alison x

Supratik

Yes, I completely agree with this. Between David and me, we had these long discussions on what we held as true. I think he was taught at the Bertrand Russell and his ideas were mainly formed by the British philosopher. Later, I came to know that in the 1930s, he was posted at Kolkata from where he knew a great deal about the Bengali culture. From here, our bonding started. I have lost all the exchange of letters, private messages with him. My loss. I can fully understand when you say that yours is good example of how two people… Read more »

No kids love ‘naught’ it’s the ridiculous PC brigade that would object A pox on them all. If you can find a good illustrator it would (under sensible circumstances) sell.

Alison x

Supratik

It’s a lovely piece. I love this one.

Guaj

Good one CW. I’m not sure if this is a lesson for kids of for grown-ups. I guess it depends on which side of high-spirits people come down on.

Clever work (as usual) from you

Dodgem

I loved this, coming just at the right time to cheer me up; we need more like this!!

Excellent!! …..Dougie

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