“Steppin’ Out”

Just a comment on lurve.



When Julie Christie steps from

Ormondroyd’s lorry.

Swinging her carefree hair

Down Bradford streets

And on the soundtrack

A flute plays happy jazzy music,

That’s how I want to feel.


I am tired, no bed for the night,

A lift has dropped me off

In some Black Country town

Redditch? Hanley? Burslem? Longton?


It’s raining, I need a smoke.

Money for beer.

A friend to phone and ask,

“Can you come and pick me up?

I’ve had a lousy day but I’m here at last.”


But I have no friend,

Empty pockets.

And only a stale, dry,

Meat and potato pie.


I only wanted love.

To live in it, share it,

Maybe get a little back.


Skipping down derelict streets.

Stepping over pavement weeds.

Like Julie Christie

On the day she changed the world.


Knowing that you were mine

And I was yours

Making everything all right.


Electric blanket winter nights.

A lover’s warm breath wafting my face.

Wondering at her night sighs, moans and giggles

As the cinema inside her sleeping head

Runs movie reels I’ll never see.


Ah but the pains

We inflicted ran too deep.

We broke our hearts and fingernails

Reaming out the rubble tunnel

Of entitlement and expectation

That blotted out the light

From that high and holy land,

The dreamscape we created

You, me, kids.

A family.


How did it end like this?

We parted with no barbed wire kiss of goodbye

Not even that. I called her bitch,

She called me bastard,

It was never meant to be this harsh.


We broke up in bitterness because we chose love.

We should have embraced indifference.

A casual coupling and easy uncoupling.


I tried not to hurt her

She tried not to hurt me

But we were outgunned.


God may forgive us for the hurts we inflicted

In breaking free of the others’ clutches… but


We will never forgive each other





© coolhermit 2023
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critique and comments welcome.
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“Reaming out the rubble tunnel” – I love the phonetics of that line! A great narrative and well worth the nominate, mate! Mitch


Great opening stanza but some other verses could be excised as, in my opinion, the poem is overlong and concentrates too much on the ‘poor me’ theme.


I could visualise him in those cold wet streets, and I really felt for him. Sometimes relationships aren’t meant to be. I enjoyed the whole story of this. Sue.


good ex[osition of a growing and dying relationship – very well expressed along the way, with no sidetracks. Good to read . (but ‘laying’ should be ‘lying’ 🙂 )


I really enjoyed reading this and delighted in things like “As the cinema inside her sleeping head/Plays movie reels/I’ll never see” – which could apply to Life in general but particularly apt for the mood of your poem.

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