An Early Morning Call

Are you being scammed?



The day starts easy enough.

Arses of cold grey cloud dissolving

into slanting winter sunshine

casting elongated shadows diagonally

across the grass, slicing it into dewy layers.

Mild clangs from expanding radiators confirm

the central heating’s firing up the next energy bill

adding percentage to my carbon footprint.


A digital ring from the phone gouges

a jagged hole in my post waking silence.

Muttering, I ‘king hell my way to the handset

expecting an, ‘it’s me.’ greeting . . , but no.

‘Good morning, my name is Jennifer.’

A barely comprehensible Asian accent

informs me she’s from Microsoft.


Anticipating her play I take a deep breathe

before choosing my response.

I used to love the opportunity these calls offered.

Legitimately releasing unbridled venom

unloading my considerable knowledge

of English foul language to some little shit.

Slamming down the phone feeling released.


Today remorse crept up and reminded me

of the poverty in this World — I cut the call

I guess it’s better than working in a sweat shop.

© Guaj 2023
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critique and comments welcome.
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for purely coincidental reasons I was listening to Clubbed to death when I decided to read your poem as a visitor, it is great to do this simultaneously then I had a brilliant idea I had to share with …you and the rest, the ending and I logged in just to do that (Liked it a lot btw)

Today remorse crept up and reminded me
of the poverty in this World — I cut the call
I guess we’re all working in a matrix sweat shop.

cheers !

Last edited 2 years ago by ifyouplease

a movie that’s all, the idea was already expressed by Philip Dick that we live in a computer simulation in his opinion, an opinion with a certain gravity of a man whose work is titanic. as for Neo as Keanu or Keanu as Neo, well they indeed chose the perfect icon for this film, who knows why, I suspect it’s because of this Nobody this Anomaly scenario that if indeed it’s a simulation of some kind and if there is an architect certain anomalies cannot be explained/glitches and his face was perfect for the role, handsome white male jesus-like, buddha-like.… Read more »


Philip Dick is talking about the after life in Ubik. Pay attention to this novel which I doubt they will make a movie ever, Philip is talking about something far more sinister than a nasty emotionless architect, then read A scanner darkly and find that immensely poetic passage about some sort of window in timelessness. You have to read Valis too which most people do not comprehend, and connect the dots of his philosophy.


I would like to see some sort of inner battle here, any scenario would do, protecting yourself from staying too close to such indignant emotions is an excellent way to close this poem.

Remorse will tap me on the shoulder, again,
reminding me of the poverty in this World.
. . . , I think cutting such calls isn’t wrong.

something like that you can use any scenario of inner battle of a secondary plot in this one.

thus you also create a very open to many interpretations ending, we don’t know what you did. but you are familiar now with these thoughts and these emotions and wiser.


btw I think based on observations that using italics in a comment last triggers the problems in the boxes and users online.
I checked it with my first comment where I intentionally used a straight exclamation mark, which means your comment above triggered it because it ends with italics.

cheers !


back to your poem, it is interesting and a form of resistance this cutting such calls line, by allowing them you unwillingly justify the existence of such scam call centres which are less strenuous sweat shops. the rich exploit the poor but how can it stop? by turning your back to anything coming from such a thing. select your shoes your clothes your food your gadgets by researching the source the factories that produce them, selecting the calls and cutting those that are like the one you describe in the poem. (we vegetarians not vegans should normally select eggs from… Read more »


you are the target and you are the reason they have such call centres, it doesn’t matter what your reaction is, they want emotion you are being harvested for energy.


“Leave a little tip for poor slob on his one-way trip,” Frank Zappa. The whole thing is a scam. Being made to feel responsible for it is the biggest scam of all.


I had fun reading this you have summed up the annoyance and frustration of these calls breaking into the day perfectly. Sue.


Brilliant expose Guaj; and haven’t we all been there? I’ve tried all sorts of defences; the weirdest was me as a demented elderly gentleman – along the lines of Henry Crun (aka The Goons). But yes, its probably best to gently put down the receiver and wish them blessings.


The worst I’ve done is actually screaming down the phone, then pretending to collapse; but it doesn’t seem to have any effect – apart from bringing my wife hurtling up the stairs!!

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