Murder
There was a new me in the mirror,
for the old me was now lost
And although there hadn’t been a trade in,
you wouldn’t believe the cost
I woke up each day tearful,
as the old me said goodbye
And I became somebody else,
before my very eyes
For the old me had been murdered,
she had taken him apart
And when I pieced him back together,
I couldn’t find his heart
It was painful trying to remember,
the way that it was lost
No there hadn’t been a trade in,
but you wouldn’t believe the cost
© marvo 2023
Views: 380
I like the poem, it leaves you guessing. There is one thing though – not the poem it’s fine – but the punctuation. I see you’re using commas, but no full stops at the end of sentences, which puzzles me – is there a reason for that?
Hi Marvo,
I agree with Dougie about the punctuation. It is crying out for full stops!
Other than that, it reads well and gets the message across.
Alison x