In the Shakespearean style, introducing a play I directed. (Slightly bawdy – be warned)
(Replicating Shakespeare’s clown introducing scenes from plays.)
Opening ACT I
Enter clown. He addresses the audience:
Oh, Thespian Gods, accept our utmost thanks
For this sweet audience, come to view our pranks.
Dear friends, our warm and heartiest welcome take;
Forgive our foibles, just for kindness sake.
The Writer’s genius you will surely see;
The awkward actors? Why, we’ll pardoned be
For all the flaws wherewith we gamely play.
Our fervent prayer is to the end you’ll stay;
You needs must feel how much we prize and love
The cunning Bard, who frowns from up above
Lest we should mouth his lines unprettily,
The dulcet words he penned so wittily…
Must I continue with this silly verse?
It adds naught to my wit –– nor purse.
Opening ACT II
Clown re-enters, strokes his chin and observes the audience settling down. He speaks:
Are you yet here? ‘Tis well, ’tis well, indeed!
For we have more to act, so pray pay heed.
We pored through all his works, perchance to learn
What pleaseth most, what we your hearts can burn.
‘Twas hard to choose from all his wondrous plays,
From all the rank and motley he arrays,
What’s best to show in clearest, sharpest light
His wisdom and his radiant genius bright.
The tragic Will, the witty William too,
The sweet, sweet Will alike we shew’d to you.
We now present, without so much ado,
Petruchio ’rayed in red and royal blue,
To wonder, ponder, how with conquest woo
The buxom, lucksome, plucksome, fucksome shrew!