Saying Goodbye…But not yet.

I wrote this last week, I had been thinking of the lives of all loved ones and how precious they are, and remain so always.


Slowly they slip away

those precious days,

fading into the heartache

of memories

 

 to become no more

than falling tears..

 

 less than the tick

of a clock, or the sigh

of a breath.

 

 I will hold you close

one last time:

 

 watch as you move

into the shadows

of the past

to come.

© sweetwater 2019
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critique and comments welcome.

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Pommer
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Hi Sue,I like this very emotive poem.Well crafted as usual,It did the trick for me, tears in my eyes thinking about my recent last Good Bye from my dear wife. Tank you. Peter xxx

Gothicman
Member

You’re unlikely to give up entirely on him, Sue, he’s meant to much to you throughout all your own developing years; he’s a part of you, and though you can be angry, at his imperfections, at his inaccessibility, at an apparent callousness and what you experience as indifference towards someone who loves him, you cannot deny all the joy he’s brought to your fragile feelings. With age, one becomes if not tougher, less impressionable, even less vulnerable; it’s a shame but with the passing years, even the emotions drift away from hope to simple, but supportive, nostalgia? And, anyway, you… Read more »

Ifyouplease
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ifyouplease **

my last goodbye was a stare, father was staring at me and I knew it was beyond his capacity to try and tell me all the things he wanted. never before have I felt so helpless and abandoned by whatever created us. at the same time the approaching future would become a past lived again and again so vividly for nearly a year now. that day is now reapproaching. that stare too. life will never be the same for me, something never moves into the shadows but stubbornly reshapes our future by reevaluating our past.

Whale
Member

‘The heartache of memories’ absolutely wonderful phrase but ‘Shadows of the past’ a cliché and from what I read, I know you can do better. Otherwise a very good poem.

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