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My mum has entered the light  

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stormwolf
(@stormwolf)
Trusted Member

I never encountered anybody who hung on to life like she did.

I made it home and left her bedside at 9pm then she slipped away at 2 am.

I had forgotten the raw torture of grief.

However while I weep she's in a beautiful place.

The cycle of life.

Alison xxx

 

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Posted : May 10, 2019 10:13 am
ionicus
(@ionicus)
Eminent Member

My deep condolences for your loss, Alison. Keep well.

Luigi xxx

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Posted : May 10, 2019 11:09 am
andrea
(@andrea)
Estimable Member Admin

So sorry to hear about your mum, Alison. I know how much she meant to you, and how you looked after her.xx

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Posted : May 10, 2019 8:57 pm
ifyouplease
(@ifyouplease)
Honorable Member

My condolences dear Alison.

xxx

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Posted : May 10, 2019 9:23 pm
stormwolf
(@stormwolf)
Trusted Member

Thank you LT

It certainly brings home our own mortality knowing you are next in line.

I had her longer than most and the prolonged and rocky path to her freedom was incredibly painful for all concerned. 

The ever changing emotional torment as her Alzheimer's progressed robbed us of her slowly.

Now she's finally gone there's a sense of disbelief. 

Thank you for your condolences. 

HA xxx

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Posted : May 11, 2019 8:52 am
stormwolf
(@stormwolf)
Trusted Member

Dearest Luigi

Thank you for your condolences, so very much appreciated. 

I am just so thankful i was with her in her last days. 

I am so glad she finally surrendered her long life

 She wanted to go for ages and I am so relieved her long days of sometimes distressing confusion are over. 

That's the practical grown up view. The other view is the child we all have within...desolate and wanting their mummy. Age is irrelevant from that angle.

Thanks again

Alison xxx

 

 

 

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Posted : May 11, 2019 9:02 am
stormwolf
(@stormwolf)
Trusted Member

HI Boss

I know i was luckier than many, both in having her  so long but also loving her as i did.

It comes to us all and no matter how prepared I was, yes  even willing her on...when she died and i saw her , there's a panicky feeling that must be the universal feeling of irretrievable loss.

I know you did not have that with your own mum and several other members have confided in me over the years, they never knew it either. So i was blessed to have her.

As I am estranged from ny own  daughter and subsequently my beloved grandchildren 3 years now I am probably feeling it worse. 

Take care of yourself 

Will write when i am back in Edinburgh. 

Much love

Alison xxx

 

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Posted : May 11, 2019 9:13 am
stormwolf
(@stormwolf)
Trusted Member

Dearest Nic

I know this will bring up deep wounds for you and your loss. As a wise friend told me "grief has no sell by date" and that is so true. It comes in waves and as time passes the waves get easier to bear then bang! It hits you all over again.

She's being laid  to rest with my father on Thursday 

It's a beautiful  plot with the sea of the Moray Firth  in tbe background. 

I shall be taking a cord at the graveside. A privilege for me.

A dare say there will be some poems rumbling about inside ? 

Love to you

Alison xxx

Ps i don't know how my replies are not under each person? ? 

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Posted : May 11, 2019 9:28 am
supratik
(@supratik)
Active Member

My deep condolences for the irreparable loss. Like you say she's in a better place, she certainly is. I lost my mother in 2013. I was beside her and could literally see her expand. She was singing an old song, without skipping any word or going out of tune, which meant as the sun rises I will come back again. 

But at the end of it all, ma is ma. 

We miss you Alison. 

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Posted : August 2, 2019 9:47 am
stormwolf
(@stormwolf)
Trusted Member

@supratik

Aww Supratik! How lovely of you. So sorry taken so long to reply. I have had one thing after another since mum died...just under par but trying to get back in the swing of things. My poetry seems to have dried up as I could write but reckon it would be too depressing so waiting for some inspiration. ?
I know exactly what you mean when you say you saw your mother "expand" I had something similar with my dad. 

Edinburgh is going like a fair just now with the festival. It's great in one way but everything becomes almost grid locked and streets closed willy-nilly making getting about a pain in the backside.  ?
Maybe the longer nights will get me writing again. (I sure hope so!)

I miss you all too. ?

Take care and as you say "Ma is Ma" Doesn't matter how long in the tooth I am, I miss her very much.

Alison xx 

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Posted : August 24, 2019 8:42 pm
amman
(@amman)
Active Member

Just caught up with your sad news, Alison.  Deepest sympathy, I know how close you were to your Mum.

Regards.

Tony.

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Posted : August 26, 2019 11:24 am
shywolf
(@shywolf)
Eminent Member

My sincerest condolences for your loss, luv.  We are on parallel paths as far as being the adult children of mums we love dearly.  My mum is getting up there in age and her health has started to waver a little this Summer.  I know that I don't have the grace and maturity to handle her passing.  I hope you find some of both in what must be a challenging time in your life.

Wolfbro xx

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Posted : August 29, 2019 4:55 am
stormwolf
(@stormwolf)
Trusted Member

Hi Bro

Thank you for your sincere condolences. Our 'long goodbye 'meant everything was said that needed to be said. 

There was only love at the end...the circle of life.

She held me as a baby and I cradled her at her exit.

In this screwed up world love is all that really matters . ? 

Wolf sis xxx

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Posted : August 31, 2019 11:16 am
stormwolf
(@stormwolf)
Trusted Member

@amman

Hi Tony ? 

Thank you for writing .

It comes to all of us in some form. I know from what people have shared to me on here that not everyone has a positive or loving relationship with their mother.

So I was blessed. 

Alison xxx

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Posted : August 31, 2019 11:21 am
SugarMama
(@sugarmama)
Active Member

Hello Alison sweetheart. I wanted to say that I'm so very sorry for your loss. It's been a while since we have touched base, but always here hun for you if ever you need to chat. I have suffered loss in a different way meaning a different family member, but the grief stays the same if you are close to the person and you love them unconditionally. Big hugs to you and much love...Lisa xxxxx

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Posted : September 6, 2019 12:30 am
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