My mum has entered the light
I never encountered anybody who hung on to life like she did.
I made it home and left her bedside at 9pm then she slipped away at 2 am.
I had forgotten the raw torture of grief.
However while I weep she's in a beautiful place.
The cycle of life.
My condolences Alison (HA). It's a strange turning point in life, when one is no longer a child. The cycle of life waits for no one. Wishing you well as you mourn your loss.
Best, Trevor (LT) xxx
Thank you LT
It certainly brings home our own mortality knowing you are next in line.
I had her longer than most and the prolonged and rocky path to her freedom was incredibly painful for all concerned.
The ever changing emotional torment as her Alzheimer's progressed robbed us of her slowly.
Now she's finally gone there's a sense of disbelief.
Thank you for your condolences.
Thank you for your condolences, so very much appreciated.
I am just so thankful i was with her in her last days.
I am so glad she finally surrendered her long life
She wanted to go for ages and I am so relieved her long days of sometimes distressing confusion are over.
That's the practical grown up view. The other view is the child we all have within...desolate and wanting their mummy. Age is irrelevant from that angle.
I know i was luckier than many, both in having her so long but also loving her as i did.
It comes to us all and no matter how prepared I was, yes even willing her on...when she died and i saw her , there's a panicky feeling that must be the universal feeling of irretrievable loss.
I know you did not have that with your own mum and several other members have confided in me over the years, they never knew it either. So i was blessed to have her.
As I am estranged from ny own daughter and subsequently my beloved grandchildren 3 years now I am probably feeling it worse.
Take care of yourself
Will write when i am back in Edinburgh.
I know this will bring up deep wounds for you and your loss. As a wise friend told me "grief has no sell by date" and that is so true. It comes in waves and as time passes the waves get easier to bear then bang! It hits you all over again.
She's being laid to rest with my father on Thursday
It's a beautiful plot with the sea of the Moray Firth in tbe background.
I shall be taking a cord at the graveside. A privilege for me.
A dare say there will be some poems rumbling about inside 😘
Love to you
Ps i don't know how my replies are not under each person? 🙄
My deep condolences for the irreparable loss. Like you say she's in a better place, she certainly is. I lost my mother in 2013. I was beside her and could literally see her expand. She was singing an old song, without skipping any word or going out of tune, which meant as the sun rises I will come back again.
But at the end of it all, ma is ma.
We miss you Alison.