Comments Stream

I can see why!! another delightful poem from you pen, I like the slow decent and all the details and esp the sunlight messaging it helps snap the reader from the trance, the ending is veiled and unexpected. Delicious. Keith

I hold my breath for fear of breathing you away
A great line in a moving piece.

Nice humour and the pacy rhythm reminds me of Jonathan Cooper-Clarke ….

Well written and atmospheric. Definitely a direction to be going in: the agent of Hell possibly rebelling against his/her overlord.

there is a poem in your reply allets, maybe I only see what they want me to see this far across the water.

“I lift my lamp beside the golden door” We sang the song in glee club. Yes, the door is still golden, the lamp lit, and the door knob owns a spectrum of black to brown to red to yellow to gold to tan to beige to white. – slc

Excellent. Was the last stanza really necessary I wonder.
Before reading the last lines, I was kind of prepared with the line ‘love is blind’ as my comment, but then I stopped and reread the whole poem.
Bon travail !

Spoken like a true poet supratik, Im certain you have many real wins 🙂

Love the yellowing grass of shifting technology and all the observation you make in this well crafted piece, also really like the conclusion, so very true. Very much enjoyed, Keith

Hi, you say you write dark poetry. They don’t come much darker than this. I truly hope your clouds have been blown away by a better wind.

It’s quite a celebration of words, rhymes and rhythms. A pleasure to read.

write for writings sake, art for artsake who cares what they think or say, listen today improve tomorow.

This is quite a heavy poem, im not sure what the writer wants me to take away from this, I guess the strongest stanza is S3 as it reveals the Copd in a poetic way but there seems to be a mix of emmotion that I must be missing something

I I I like it very upbeat…..boo boo boo to the bla bla bla, my son you will go far.

Ass or arse it’s all a load of hot air lol amusing write

This made me smile, and is an interesting way of looking at things, flows good and more than just a piece of nonsense but rather a good work

Very good question, one to many cannot face the answer to unfortunately, good write

Totally atmospheric, the words grab you and at the same time chill you, you take the macabre and make it interesting

So very true unfortunately, well wrote

The only way I could describe this other than possative is ‘bubbly’ nice write