The Mouse and Like-Button


Visit the Mouse and Like-Button

online pub

for a frothing pint of ale

and a steak and kidney pie

with a wall of reinforced glass

between you and the other patrons

for that authentic

Internet conversation feel.


When someone asks you

tricky questions like

“So why is it that only white people can commit racism?”,

you can just carry on drinking

in a relaxing environment of silence,

or write “shut up u stoopid prik u is talkin shit”

on a chalkboard,

bravely from behind your

wall of protective reinforced glass.


Your friends have the option

of adding “lol”

or a thumbs-up sign

in a range of coloured chalks.


For those particularly inconvenient

real-world intellectual challenges, like

“Haven’t the Arabs stolen all of North Africa from black people though?”

special buttons are provided

to eject your conversation partner

through a trap door

and out of your sight forever.


Come and have a drink

in the cosy surroundings

of the Mouse and Like-Button

online pub,

and feel liberated

from the drudgery of social skills

and of having to defend

your ill-thought-out, empty, sanctimonious opinions.





© Gammon 2020
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critique and comments welcome.
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3 months ago

Hey! A little less of the sanctimonious thank you! Are trolls welcome by the way?


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