La Scaligeri  

Benno79
Member

 

                 To the outside world, the city of Verona seems like the most romantic place in the western world. With it’s winding roads, quaint little cafes, Juliet’s balcony, Roman amphitheatre and medieval castle, it’s the symbol of all that could possibly be good in life. Under the surface of the city however, like most other Italian cities, it has it’s dark side which stretches back over generations.

 

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Posted : May 13, 2017 6:21 pm
e-griff
Member

I went to Verona once in the summer and there was a hailstorm. People were shovelling hail out of open cars. We sat in a nice cafe until it stopped. 

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Posted : May 13, 2017 8:01 pm
sirat
Member

I'll be going there with Jean later in the year. Her brother and sister-in-law are coming over from Australia for a shared family holiday at Lake Garda and we'll land at Verona and spend a little while there before we take the bus. I'm looking forward to it. I loved the film Letters to Juliet.

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Posted : May 15, 2017 9:47 am
e-griff
Member

But to be serious about 'hook'. Although this is informative, it doesn't exactly grab you by the throat and make you desperate to read on. I noted the 'dark side' but that was pretty low key.  Just off the cuff , something like 'Luigi was thrust back against the wall as a fist smashed into his face. For a moment he was confused, but then recognised the face of Mario, his family's old enemy ...'  etc - yes that's not a particularly serious suggestion but I hope you get the picture.

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Posted : May 16, 2017 3:54 pm
e-griff
Member

To clarify, just in case you misunderstand, my comments are not a critique of your work, nor a reason to change the opening. This forum is solely about writing a 'hook' 

They are only used where they suit the story and would be completely out of place in some types of story of course. Just one weapon in the fiction writer's arsenal. . 

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Posted : May 17, 2017 10:11 am
  
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