Green, green gone

Intro: Savvi

Strange that it had grown
on the side of a sandstone slab.
A huge knarred hand reaching out
to touch another world,
held by an underground prison.
I thought of it as old
generations had played at its wrist,
swung from its finger tips.

The rope had been robbed
from a coal mine,
It gave out black blisters
and was hung by a rumour.

The pendulum effect was magnificent,
motion sickness spun from the canopy
to the creak of a rolling Galleon.
Roots collected skin and blood
from thin boned boys on summer days
that shared a look at dirty books,
before they chanced the rope
and felt the kiss of bark.

They chopped off its hand
with no one to hold it,
broke up the slab,
sealed the wound with tar,
built houses over its tomb.

I walked up the hill to see it gone,
my clothes grew with each step,
until I stood as a small boy
remembering,
how I once learned to fly.


 

© savvi 2017
Views: 200
critique and comments welcome.

Leave a Comment

8 Comments on "Green, green gone"

Notify of
Ionicus
Member

A nice descriptive poem about the sad end of a gnarled branch of a tree which has given pleasure to a countless number of youngsters who swung on it supported only by a flimsy old rope.
Good phraseology. I particularly like ‘ The rope….. was hung by a rumour.’ and ‘felt the kiss of bark’. Well written, Keith.
I think the comma after ‘old’ in line 6 is not necessary.
Best, Luigi.

Stormwolf
Member

Made me want to cry. Absolutely heart rending and poignant.
Deserves to be much more widely read. What’s up with folk?
thirty read and only one could comment.
I think as we get older, we understand the transience of life, the innocence and beauty of youth.
When I go home to the small town where I was born and grew up, I wander about seeing things long since gone. I see it all so clearly.
‘progress’ can be devastating. 🙁

Alison x

ps here’s a nomination well deserved.

Shywolf
Member

A most moving elegy, Keith. Well constructed, and thematically unified, it reminded me a lot of Dylan Thomas’ Fern Hill. Congratulations on the nom.

Glenn

Gothicman
Member

I think this was the first poem of yours I read, the first insight into the skilful off-centre ability of your writing. Your only weakness appears to be in choosing titles as this one, for me, gives good example. Green, green, gone, sounds a bit…..!
( The Moving Hand?) Loved the poem though, so many good lines. I think I nominated it the first time round, Alison’s beaten me to it this time. Well-deserved!
Best, Trevor

wpDiscuz
Flag Content